Hey World, I’m Confident: why I don’t need to prove it

I am super content, comfortable and confident in my own skin. That said, showing off that skin to everyone and their brother on the internet isn’t part of my plan.  Do I really need to prove my confidence?  I don’t think so.  I don’t feel the need to take bikini, underwear or even shots in a sports bra and leggings just to say “hey world, I’m confident.”  Nor do I feel like I need to prove the shape of my midsection to anyone in order to make myself worthy of helping others get healthy.  

I could probably stop this post right here.  The above statement is probably enough but I have a little more to say.  I want to tell you why, for now, I’ve made this decision and clarify that I’m not passing judgement on others.  This is just what, at this current time, I’ve decided is right for me. This decision is extremely important to the message I’m sending and how I intend to help others.

I really started the journey of helping others get healthy and live at their best several years ago. When I added blogging and social media into the mix, I knew pictures would be big part and I very much struggled with it because this whole thing I’m doing is to help you.  It is not to promote how great I am. Because I’m not better than anyone else, I’m totally just a regular mom, with laundry on my couch that needs to be folded as we speak.  It really scared me that you would think I had it all together and that since I am obviously a super mom and wife, the things I do, the tips I share, the way I do nutrition, just simply can’t be replicated.  Posting nice photos in general made me anxious.  Then I looked around at other bloggers, fitness coaches, nutrition experts and saw a common thread.  Lots of shots featuring workouts.  Some pictures in tiny shorts and a sports bra, others straight on showing chiseled abs and another common pose: the one from the back side to show off a booty that clearly says “I do squats.”  I’ve even seen people posting nude pictures for all to see.  Getting into this niche I felt a little pressure to follow suit, showing more of my body than I was used to.  Honestly (minus the nudes) I’d be fine posting the classic fitness pictures in tiny clothes… I’ve really got nothing to hide.  But in everything I do, I ask: what is the motive behind this?  Is it helpful to me or to someone else?  Is it promoting self or is it promoting my end goal of actually helping people?  Last, and possibly the most important question I ask:  what is it showing or teaching my girls?

You see, my over arching goal is to help you feel fulfilled in your own life.  To help YOU be confident, healthy and strong, to help you make better decisions for YOU, to empower YOU to take control of your health.  In putting myself out there, I also hope to consequently motivate you to go for your dreams.  Those things are my focus, those are my goals.  My goal is not to make you want to look more like me or mold your body to appear more like mine.  I don’t want to give you another picture to hold in your mind as something you need to achieve and I certainly don’t want you to compare where you are to where I am.  I want you to feel comfortable being YOU and have the desire to lean into your own greatness.  I do not feel that me showing off my imperfect yet perfectly fine body and how confident I am in it is the best way for me to go about empowering you. There’s a girl who pops up on my facebook feed every now and then.  She promotes and sells a workout program.  I’m pretty sure she does post pictures that show her abs but in the promotional video she uses as an ad, those great abs just aren’t visible.  She’s wearing cute leggings and a full top.  Scrolling the comment section women say things like: “it would be nice to see her abs.”  “wonder what her abs even look like.” “If her abs are so great, why is she covering them up?”  First, holy cow we are obsessed with abs!  Second, this girl is beautiful, has glowing skin, and obviously takes very good care of her health.  Does she need to prove her abs to help other women?!

With social media we’ve become even more obsessed than ever with proving everything in pictures.  Just like it’s not enough to say I went on vacation, I need to prove it in photos, as a blogger in the realm of nutrition and fitness it’s an unwritten rule that I will prove my worthiness by way of pictures of my body.  But it’s important to note, I’ve never been a rule follower, especially the unwritten ones.  As a teen my dad more than once told me “only dead fish swim with the current.”  It stuck.  This is me fully alive, going my own way.

I’ll get to my final point.  Not being showy with my body is also symbolic of where I want to push and shift your focus.  If you want to get great abs, I guess focus on that.  But getting healthy is always the first step.  Just make healthy choices your goal and focus. Take your thoughts off physique.  It will eventually just fall into place as a byproduct of your improved health.  After all, are we living to look great or to be great?  Trust me there’s a difference and, I’m totally striving for number two.  

You guys, we all have the ability to be healthy, fulfilled and feel good about ourselves.  I’ve reached that point, so I’m here to help you get there too!  I want everything I do here to lead to you closer to your best and leave you feeling great about YOU!

Blessings,

Rita

Read more about blogging associated fears and staying real with you HERE.

Get ideas on how to start incorporating fitness into your busy life HERE.

Free workout printable available HERE.